| Not long after Arlyn died, my husband and
| |
| | be an AA group for those who struggle
|
| I decided to attend a support group
| |
| | with alcohol, an abuse group for those
|
| program run by the local Hospice
| |
| | who have been victimized by abusers, a
|
| organization. We felt lost, afraid, and
| |
| | group for people addicted to gambling, or
|
| alone, and we desperately needed to
| |
| | a grief group for those who are trying to
|
| understand the emotional roller coaster
| |
| | survive the loss of a loved one by
|
| we were on.So the night of the first
| |
| | death.It's a place to go to so you can
|
| support meeting, we drove 30 miles to the
| |
| | connect with others who have almost
|
| church where the meeting was held. The
| |
| | walked in your shoes.Some support groups
|
| room we walked into had a single row of
| |
| | are run by professionals. They generally
|
| fold-up chairs arranged in a circle,
| |
| | have a program to follow, materials to
|
| refreshments on a table, and a friendly
| |
| | take home with information, and they are
|
| woman welcomed us.We had arrived early;
| |
| | led by people with college degrees. They
|
| all of the seats were empty. After I
| |
| | sometimes encourage people to set goals,
|
| glanced at my husband, to make sure he
| |
| | and they sometimes offer therapy.Other
|
| had not turned around and walked out, we
| |
| | support groups are lead by those who have
|
| sat down quietly on the seats closest to
| |
| | no official certification, but whose
|
| us and to the door.Shortly after we
| |
| | experience may teach them more about the
|
| arrived, a few other people wandered in
| |
| | common issue than anything they could
|
| and took seats also. We nodded at them
| |
| | read about in books.I have participated
|
| nervously, wondering if their stories
| |
| | in both types of support groups, and I
|
| were like ours, wondering if they had
| |
| | find value in both. They meet different
|
| nightmares as bad as we did.And then, the
| |
| | needs in different ways.I personally
|
| meeting began. The facilitator spoke. She
| |
| | think the value of peer-lead support
|
| welcomed us all, stated that everyone in
| |
| | groups are greatly undervalued, however.
|
| the room had lost a loved one, and asked
| |
| | When people sit in a circle and share
|
| us to introduce ourselves.One by one, the
| |
| | their stories and hearts with others who
|
| people present stated their names and
| |
| | will not pass judgement on them, others
|
| briefly told us about why they were
| |
| | who truly do know how they feel, a huge
|
| there. Some of them shed tears as they
| |
| | burden is often lifted from their
|
| talked.As each one spoke, my mind was
| |
| | shoulders.Lifting that emotional burden
|
| trying to take in a situation outside of
| |
| | seems to be the key to survival, the key
|
| my experience. How could this be? We
| |
| | to living life again - as opposed to
|
| thought we were the only ones in the
| |
| | being pulled down into deep depression
|
| world who were grieving. We were not
| |
| | and not finding the strength to come back
|
| alone, after all!For the next couple
| |
| | up.The best thing about peer lead support
|
| hours, we talked - and listened. We
| |
| | groups is that they are free! The worst
|
| discovered that some of our feelings
| |
| | thing about them is that there are not
|
| matched the feelings of others there.
| |
| | enough of them around.Quote of the
|
| Perhaps we were not abnormal, after
| |
| | day:When it seems that our sorrow is too
|
| all!Best of all, though, when we said
| |
| | great to be borne, let us think of the
|
| Arlyn's name, and when we said the word
| |
| | great family of the heavy-hearted into
|
| suicide, no one blinked an eye! No one
| |
| | which our grief has given us entrance,
|
| got up and walked out, no one replied by
| |
| | and inevitably, we will feel about us
|
| saying, Get over it! She's gone! And no
| |
| | their arms, their sympathy, their
|
| one even hinted that it was our
| |
| | understanding. - Helen KellerBy Karyl
|
| fault.During the meeting, some of us
| |
| | Chastain BealMission in life before
|
| cried. No one tried to stop us. During
| |
| | Arlyn's death was teaching children. Now,
|
| the meeting, some of us talked about
| |
| | it's teaching those left behind after
|
| funerals, and no one squirmed. It was
| |
| | suicide to survive and live again. It's
|
| amazing.We were the only ones in the
| |
| | also educating the public about suicide
|
| group who had come because of the death
| |
| | and suicide grief.Beal is a certified
|
| of a daughter, and we were the only ones
| |
| | thanatologist via the Association on
|
| mourning a suicide death, but even then,
| |
| | Death Education and Counseling. Owner if
|
| the connection we felt with others was
| |
| | several websites devoted to suicide
|
| strong. We were not alone.By the time we
| |
| | support and education. Has published
|
| left the meeting, I felt emotionally
| |
| | writings in Chicken Soup for the
|
| drained, but that was exactly what I had
| |
| | Unsinkable Soul, the Journal for the
|
| needed. A safe place to talk, to vent, to
| |
| | National Alliance on Mentally Ill,
|
| connect. A place where I could find
| |
| | Seventeen Magazine and various
|
| someone to walk with me.That's what a
| |
| | newspapers.
|
| support group is: a safe place. It may
| |
| |
|
