| Copyright (c) 2008 Debra Sale Wendler | | | | control you, plain and simple. Catering |
| | | | parents answer food complaints by making |
| If your child has ODD (oppositional defiant | | | | something the child prefers. The ungrateful |
| disorder) or bipolar, you're familiar with | | | | child wins again. Next time he'll complain |
| child behavior problems. If your child has | | | | more so that he can win more. Your child's |
| signs of autism, ADHD or ADD (attention | | | | whining and complaining will end when you |
| deficit disorder), Aspergers, or PDD-NOS | | | | learn how to provide his special needs. |
| (Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not | | | | |
| Otherwise Specified), you may be seeing | | | | 4. Argues. Everything is a battle, from when |
| challenging behaviors. | | | | to wake up, to what to wear, and when to go |
| | | | to bed. This day-long string of quarrels and |
| Five Warning Signs of Challenging Child | | | | disputes is exhausting and quickly erodes |
| Behavior: | | | | your relationship. Your child's arguing |
| | | | proves that he challenges your authority. |
| If you suspect that your child's difficult | | | | When he is confident in your authority, he |
| behavior is something more than just being a | | | | will give up some of his need to set his own |
| kid, these are the warning signs of a | | | | rules. |
| full-fledged challenging child. | | | | |
| | | | 5. Is oppositional. You say now; your child |
| 1. Refuses to look up into your eyes. This is | | | | says never. Oppositional children challenge |
| one of the early signs that your parent-child | | | | everything, your requests, your rules, and |
| relationship is in trouble. He refuses to | | | | your schedule. It's exhausting, and heart |
| look up into your eyes because that gives you | | | | breaking, and can cause you to want to escape |
| power. He doesn't trust you enough to give | | | | your child's tyranny. Who can blame you? |
| you that control. To test this, ask your | | | | |
| child to sit beside you while you show him | | | | If Your Child is Challenging, Listen Up. |
| something, for example, a book or picture. | | | | |
| Ask a friend or older child to observe how | | | | If you're like 99.99% of parents of |
| your child looks at you. | | | | challenging children, you may be making |
| | | | innocent errors all day long that actually |
| The solution is to mend your relationship. It | | | | make your child's behavior worse. Please |
| is rare to find anyone who offers | | | | don't blame yourself. You couldn't possibly |
| step-by-step advice on how to do this. The | | | | have guessed. So you can forgive yourself |
| first step is to learn and respect your | | | | right now. |
| child's special needs without getting | | | | |
| emotionally overwhelmed and without catering | | | | The five warning signs listed above reveal |
| to his demands. When you learn how to mend | | | | how ODD (oppositional defiant disorder) |
| your parent-child relationship, your child | | | | develops (65% of children with ADHD develop |
| will look up into your eyes with respect. | | | | it). If your child has ODD, or is developing |
| | | | it, his difficult behavior will get worse |
| 2. Refuses to learn from you. Even your | | | | unless you take action. |
| simple efforts to teach him how to hold a | | | | |
| fork or comb his hair are refused. He has | | | | Your child needs your specific help to stop |
| decided that you are not to be trusted, and | | | | these problem behaviors. He cannot do it on |
| therefore he cannot learn from you. You can | | | | his own. |
| test this by asking your child to sit with | | | | |
| you as you teach him something, for example, | | | | You Can Solve This. |
| how to draw a tree. If the battles begin, | | | | |
| that's your warning. When you mend your | | | | The good news is that ODD can be easily |
| parent-child relationship, your child will | | | | prevented or minimized. The solution is |
| allow you to teach him. | | | | easier than you think. If you are seeing the |
| | | | warning signs that your child is challenging |
| 3. Whines and complains. No matter how hard | | | | and not just being a typical kid, I invite |
| you try to please him, he always finds | | | | you to use these parenting tips to improve |
| something to complain about, for example, the | | | | his behavior and improve your family life. |
| food you prepare. This is an effort to | | | | |