| There are many different social skills and the | | | | significant conversation. You could be at your |
| impact they have on other people varies. Acting | | | | vet's office talking to another pet owner about |
| on two or three "easy" skills isn't enough. The | | | | their pet or picking up your child from daycare |
| best results are achieved when several skills are | | | | and beginning a conversation with another parent. |
| used in combination with one another. The | | | | These situations are based on common ground so |
| expression "the total is greater than the sum of | | | | a topic for discussion already exists and you're |
| its parts" resonates loudly with respect to social | | | | not trying to establish one. As well, you'll meet up |
| skills. When individuals combine various skills such | | | | with most of these people again - at work, in |
| as listening, making small talk, giving compliments, | | | | another meeting, the next day at daycare - so |
| maintaining eye contact, greeting others warmly, | | | | you can start to establish a friendly rapport with |
| and many others, they will experience more social | | | | them. |
| success in many different situations. | | | | 4. Events to Attend, Invitations to Accept and |
| Strong social skills include (among others): | | | | Clubs or Associations to Join |
| - active listening | | | | Once you have learned a few social skills |
| - knowing how to greet others | | | | techniques, challenge yourself by attending events |
| - conversing and making small talk | | | | or social gatherings to try out your new skills. |
| - building a friendly rapport | | | | It's probably easier and less stressful for the |
| - complimenting others | | | | beginner to go to an event where there is a main |
| - offering praise and encouragement | | | | attraction - such as a keynote speaker, panel |
| - showing support and understanding | | | | discussion or performance - so that the pressure |
| - acknowledging others | | | | to interact is lessened, but the opportunity to |
| - saying 'thank you' | | | | meet people and to interact is still there. If the |
| Techniques and methods are available to develop | | | | occasion focuses solely on the interaction |
| all social skills. Knowing what to say and how to | | | | between guests, such as a dinner party, it may |
| act are basic social skills that anyone can learn. | | | | put more pressure on the beginner to be "on" for |
| Here are five tips for improving social skills: | | | | the entire evening. |
| 1. Start with the skills that feel the most | | | | Alternatively, if you're already comfortable in the |
| comfortable to you. | | | | company of others, a dinner party would be ideal |
| There is such a wide variety of social skills to | | | | to practice your social skills and reunite with |
| learn that you can begin with the skills with which | | | | friends and acquaintances, make new friends, |
| you feel the most comfortable. | | | | have good conversations and simply have a good |
| It can be as simple as constructing a meaningful | | | | time with everyone else. |
| "thank-you," a compliment or using a technique to | | | | Membership in clubs and associations brings |
| remember names. Practicing these skills in | | | | together individuals who share common interests |
| situations where a comfort level already exists | | | | and is a basis for mutually satisfying conversation |
| builds confidence and, as more skills are added, | | | | and ongoing interaction. Implementing social skills in |
| begins to establish good interpersonal relationships. | | | | these situations is easier than having to discover |
| 2. Work on your social skills before you're in a | | | | areas of interest or expertise from scratch - |
| situation where you really need them. | | | | although this is easy to do when you have the |
| When you're using skills such as giving quality | | | | skills. |
| feedback or negotiating, it's better to have | | | | When working on your skills, it's very important |
| established a rapport, whenever possible, with the | | | | to put yourself in situations where you can act on |
| individuals involved prior to beginning these | | | | them - even if it makes you uncomfortable. Keep |
| discussions. These kinds of situations have the | | | | the techniques in mind, knowing that with practice |
| potential to be difficult and intimidating, so having | | | | the skills become easier and easier to use. |
| positive interactions before these situations come | | | | 5. Practice |
| up will make them much easier to approach. | | | | The more frequently you interact with others and |
| Constant maintenance of good relationships builds | | | | put yourself in situations where you're meeting, |
| a strong foundation so there's a better chance of | | | | working or getting to know someone, the more |
| weathering challenging times. These interactions | | | | your skills will develop and the easier they |
| can be very simple - from greeting colleagues in | | | | become. Continual practice as you go about your |
| the elevator to acknowledging others on the | | | | daily activities is never time wasted - you're |
| workshop floor to making small talk at staff | | | | building and strengthening your interpersonal |
| meetings. Over time, these small interactions | | | | relationships as you improve your skills. |
| make a big difference in your relationships and | | | | Social skills are, and will always be, an important |
| ongoing success. | | | | part of ongoing, daily interactions. They're not |
| 3. Make a point of interacting with others in | | | | something learned one day and forgotten the |
| familiar situations. | | | | next. They require a continuous, conscious |
| When you've learned some techniques, start | | | | awareness of the various skills. Fortunately, it |
| practicing your new social skills in your daily life. | | | | doesn't take a long time nor a lot of effort to |
| This could be at a work meeting where you | | | | develop good social skills; the rewards are |
| speak to someone you haven't talked to before | | | | certainly worth it. |
| or to someone with whom you've never had any | | | | |