| Help your kids manage their emotions and avoid | | | | far as it may need to go. |
| sabotaging their good times with impulsive | | | | 4. Agree on signals that will cue your child to |
| behavior. This is especially challenging for kids and | | | | avoid behaviors that invite frustration or |
| adults who are highly sensitive, or who have | | | | embarrassment. Sometimes they just do not |
| Asperger Syndrome, Autism or ADHD. | | | | know until it's too late. You may not always be |
| Here are seven strategies to help them handle | | | | able to be at the scene, but when you can, have |
| frustration. | | | | a subtle way of sending a "You are heading for |
| 1. Help them find in-the-moment strategies for | | | | trouble" message. It may be a wink or a gesture |
| self-calming. Make your child an active participant | | | | as subtle as smoothing your hair back - just |
| in exploring what will work best for him. 'Take a | | | | enough for her to pick up the cue and say |
| break'. 'Tune in to what's happening with your | | | | "Woops!" and do a self-correction. |
| body'. 'Take your mind to an imaginary place that | | | | 5. Help your child to think ahead about the |
| feels peaceful'. | | | | consequences to his actions. Ask questions like |
| 2. Get clear on triggers that send your child into | | | | "What will it feel like after you do this?" and |
| meltdown. Ask questions like "What happens just | | | | "What do you think will happen if ---?" |
| before you want to explode?" Notice patterns, | | | | 6. Help your child prepare for the inevitable |
| such as tiredness or hunger that wear down | | | | mistakes. Ask thinking questions of your child: |
| energy and bring on irritable moods. Once you | | | | "How will you help yourself make a correction for |
| identify triggers, you can then work on helping | | | | the future?" or "What can you do right away if |
| your child to avoid 'losing it'. | | | | this happens again?" |
| 3. For kids who don't or won't talk much, create a | | | | 7. Make it safe for your child to come you to |
| system where they write or tape their feelings to | | | | process what happened. If you preach, judge or |
| be shared when they are ready. This is a great | | | | over-teach you may not get another chance to |
| way to safely vent feelings and often, that's as | | | | help for a long time. |