| You're prepared, polished, and ready to
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| | script that just isn't working? Is your
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| go. You step up to the podium and "bang,
| |
| | presentation boring? Are you being
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| bang, bang" - you get shot down by a
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| | speaker-centered instead of focusing on
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| hostile audience. How do you keep your
| |
| | the listener's needs and interests? Are
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| cool and take back control?When I started
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| | you reacting to a difficult person
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| out as a consultant, I remember landing
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| | instead of responding to the
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| my first large account. My assignment was
| |
| | situation?Set it Up Many problems can be
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| to design and deliver writing and
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| | avoided by establishing expectations from
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| presentation skills seminars for 30 MBA
| |
| | the beginning. When people are unclear
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| trainees. Finally, the big day came when
| |
| | about their goals, roles, and how they're
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| I was ready to deliver the training.
| |
| | being evaluated, difficult behavior can
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| There was just one slight glitch.
| |
| | result. Once expectations are clear,
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| Management scheduled the first major
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| | provide ongoing feedback and really
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| technical exam the day after my training
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| | listen to what people are saying. If a
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| seminar. Naturally, the MBAs thought they
| |
| | person does not feel heard or respected,
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| would have the day before to study and
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| | he or she will manifest resistant
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| prepare for the exam. To make things
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| | behavior.Cast of Characters
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| worse, they told them that I would be
| |
| | Who is the personality that can really
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| providing only a one hour coaching
| |
| | push your buttons? Is it the know-it-all
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| session. In reality we were scheduled for
| |
| | or the whining complainer who finds fault
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| a full day. The trainees stormed into the
| |
| | with everything? To stay cool and in
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| manager's office and threatened to
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| | control, begin by recognizing which type
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| boycott the class.At four o'clock that
| |
| | of person will set you off. By
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| day, their manager called me and said,
| |
| | pinpointing such individuals, you will
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| "Diane, I wouldn't want to be in your
| |
| | strengthen your ability to handle
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| shoes tomorrow." I ran to the human
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| | them.Here are a few difficult
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| resource manager who hired me and tried
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| | personalities and how to handle them:
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| to convince her to reschedule the class.
| |
| | Eager Beaver - This person is always the
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| She wouldn't budge.I didn't sleep that
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| | first to participate and is eager to
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| night while I racked my brain trying to
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| | help, making it difficult for others to
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| think of a solution. If I called in sick,
| |
| | respond. Don't dampen this individual's
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| I would lose the account. But I didn't
| |
| | enthusiasm. Acknowledge his/her
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| want to walk into a lion's den. It was
| |
| | contributions and suggest that others
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| this conundrum that spurred me on to
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| | participate.Expert - Challenges your
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| develop my 3D strategy for managing
| |
| | authority; argues with others. This may
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| difficult behavior.Practice the 3D
| |
| | truly be a person with expertise who
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| Strategy:Depersonalize, Detach, and
| |
| | wants recognition. Acknowledge comments
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| Defuse Whether you're managing a team,
| |
| | without getting defensive. (Remember,
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| running a meeting, or giving a formal
| |
| | depersonalize, detach, defuse.) Ask the
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| presentation, it's not enough to know
| |
| | group for other opinions. One of the best
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| your material. You must be able to manage
| |
| | strategies is to play to his or her
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| the process. Group dynamics are ever
| |
| | expertise. Invite and recognize the
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| changing and dealing with groups can be
| |
| | expert's comments. Soon you will have an
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| sticky. That's why a good leader or
| |
| | ally instead of an enemy.Rambler - This
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| facilitator is able to change perspective
| |
| | is a storyteller. You ask for the time,
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| and use a number of strategies.Step one
| |
| | you get the history of watch making. To
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| is to depersonalize. People come with
| |
| | manage the rambler, cut in, summarize the
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| their own emotional baggage. One woman
| |
| | comments, and ask for other opinions.
|
| walked out of a motivational speech
| |
| | Don't let this individual drone on. Poor
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| because the speaker was wearing an Elvis
| |
| | Loser - These people will not admit to a
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| costume and she did not like Elvis. Her
| |
| | mistake. They don't have the ego strength
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| departure had nothing to do with the
| |
| | to acknowledge an error. Do not back them
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| speaker's talent or competence. The
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| | into a corner. Instead, agree to
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| lesson? If you are met with a hostile
| |
| | disagree. Let them save face.Dominator -
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| audience or an audience with a few
| |
| | Wants to control. He/she can intimidate
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| disinterested members: Don't take it
| |
| | the group by monopolizing the
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| personally.Step two is to detach. That
| |
| | conversation or activity. Don't let
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| means that you don't engage the ego. Once
| |
| | dominators take over. Use humor. For
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| you go head-to-head with that heckler,
| |
| | example, when asking for a response, you
|
| you set up a competitive dynamic. Don't
| |
| | can jokingly say something such as:
|
| let your emotions get out of control. Ask
| |
| | "Someone other than Jerry!" If that
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| questions to gain understanding. Do not
| |
| | doesn't work, call a break and speak to
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| get defensive.Step three is to defuse.
| |
| | that person privately.Side Conversations
|
| Dissipate the negative energy. One of the
| |
| | - Two or more people engage in regular
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| best defusers is humor. If you get tense,
| |
| | conversations during your presentation.
|
| the negative energy will increase. Take a
| |
| | If it is a large auditorium, ignore it.
|
| light, playful approach. You can't laugh
| |
| | In smaller groups, this behavior can be
|
| and be angry at the same time.Managing
| |
| | distracting. Make eye contact with the
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| ResistanceTo get a handle on a difficult
| |
| | talkers and stop speaking until they look
|
| audience, begin to recognize the signs of
| |
| | up. You can confront them directly and
|
| resistance. Are attendees side-talking,
| |
| | ask them to hold their conversation until
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| reading the paper, challenging you,
| |
| | later. Or try the walk technique. Walk
|
| having difficulty understanding
| |
| | toward them, stand in front of them and
|
| directions, or sitting with closed body
| |
| | keep talking. They will get the
|
| language? If you have ever felt like you
| |
| | message.Negative - Very resistant and
|
| were working too hard to get a response,
| |
| | negative about you, the subject matter,
|
| chances are you were dealing with
| |
| | and doesn't want to be there. Begin to
|
| resistance. Once you recognize
| |
| | acknowledge his or her concerns. Ask the
|
| resistance, figure out where it is coming
| |
| | group to problem solve or offer to
|
| from.Reasons for resistance fall into
| |
| | discuss the concerns later. Complainer
|
| three categories:How to
| |
| | Whiner - Finds fault with everything.
|
| Chance to
| |
| | Likes to whine but has no solutions. He
|
| Want toIs the reason for resistance that
| |
| | or she is not necessarily negative about
|
| they don't know how to participate? If
| |
| | the subject matter, but likes to
|
| so, then provide clearer instructions for
| |
| | complain. This is the "Yes, but. . ."
|
| how you expect them to participate. Is it
| |
| | person. Don't get caught in their game.
|
| that they don't have a chance to be
| |
| | Instead, ask the audience for
|
| productively involved? For example, let's
| |
| | alternatives. Stay focused and move
|
| say you asked participants to turn to a
| |
| | on.Hecklers - Try to ignore them. If the
|
| partner to discuss the point you just
| |
| | heckler gets no response from you, he/she
|
| made and some people don't respond. Maybe
| |
| | may give up. A clever retort will only
|
| they couldn't find a partner. Help them
| |
| | challenge the heckler to come back at you
|
| partner-up. By way of another example,
| |
| | again. Walk over to this person and put
|
| think of a team in which all but two
| |
| | your hand on his/her shoulder as you keep
|
| members are actively participating in a
| |
| | talking to the group. Don't show any
|
| brainstorming exercise. It could be that
| |
| | hostility or use any put-downs. Another
|
| the two quiet members are introverts in a
| |
| | technique is to ask the person to
|
| group of extroverts. They may not be able
| |
| | identify himself - most hecklers prefer
|
| to jump in and be heard. When this is the
| |
| | anonymity.When dealing with difficult
|
| case, provide an opportunity.The last
| |
| | audiences, remember that the disruptive
|
| reason for resistance is a lack of
| |
| | behavior is a symptom of an unmet need.
|
| motivation. You ask for a volunteer and
| |
| | Your best strategy is a sense of humor
|
| nobody moves. Perhaps they don't see the
| |
| | and an understanding of what's driving
|
| benefit. Maybe they have too much on
| |
| | the behavior. The next time you encounter
|
| their plates and can't take on any more
| |
| | a difficult audience, take a 3D view -
|
| assignments. Perhaps they don't want to
| |
| | depersonalize, detach, and defuse.Excerpt
|
| intrude on their colleague's territory.
| |
| | from Knockout Presentations (Chandler
|
| Your job is to help them see the value of
| |
| | House Press).Diane DiResta, President of
|
| participating.To break resistance, use a
| |
| | DiResta Communications, Inc, a New York
|
| pattern interrupt. In other words, do
| |
| | City communication skills
|
| something different. Shake them up. Pick
| |
| | consultancy,works with organizations who
|
| up the pace. Tell a story. Get your
| |
| | want to communicate with greater impact.
|
| audience involved. Children at play are
| |
| | She is the author of the best selling
|
| not resistant. Are you doing anything
| |
| | public speaking book, Knockout
|
| that is contributing to their resistance?
| |
| | Presentations.
|
| Are you too rigid? Are you following a
| |
| |
|
