| Shy or Withdrawn Behavior as Destructive or | | | | self-conscious. This type of behavior is often |
| Maladaptive. Hundreds of thousands of teens are | | | | contrasted with the sometimes more obvious |
| bullied every day. Bullying has everyone worried, | | | | "externalizing" problems of an outgoing, direct teen |
| not just the kids on its receiving end. Yet because | | | | who is busy stealing cars, drinking and causing |
| parents, teachers, and other adults don't always | | | | trouble for others. Common Reasons for Shyness |
| see it, they may not understand how extreme | | | | and Withdrawal: 1) Self-consciousness (related to |
| bullying can get. Social withdrawal is fear of, or | | | | appearance, behavior) 2) Under-developed social |
| withdrawal from, people or social situations. | | | | skills 3) Substance abuse 4) Underlying feelings of |
| Shyness becomes a problem when it interferes | | | | insecurity and/or inadequacy 5) Significant |
| with relationships with others, in social situations, | | | | introversion with ambivalent emotions 6) Identity |
| or other aspect's of a child's life. Problems with | | | | confusion or uncertainty In assessing your teen, |
| shyness are usually evident by the time a child is | | | | look at whether or not your child is compliant or |
| three years old. The shy/withdrawn adolescent | | | | defiant, reserved or outgoing, routine or |
| may have major conflicts and issues but nobody | | | | spontaneous. The shy/withdrawn teen will tend |
| knows. In fact, sometimes parents are not able | | | | toward compliance, be reserved and prefer |
| to detect the internal storm or struggle in the shy | | | | routine. He/she may move away or avoid others |
| or withdrawn, largely due to an external calm. Shy | | | | when difficulties arise. At times, withdrawn |
| and withdrawn teens are oftentimes highly | | | | behavior can take on the role of indirect |
| sensitive to their immediate environment. Parents | | | | (sometimes passive-aggressive) anger. Below are |
| thus need to be available and consistent in their | | | | suggestions for children who are socially anxious, |
| actions. Many adolescents lack an internal | | | | while parents should contact a licensed |
| structure for control and find it difficult to focus | | | | professional for more specific anxiety problems. |
| on a consistent and constructive problem-solving | | | | Build your child's self esteem Develop your child's |
| plan. Parents can help by providing meaningful | | | | social skills. Allow your child to warm up to a |
| structure.. Unfortunately, teens may not have the | | | | situation and don't push them too hard. Expose |
| self-awareness to recognize how their | | | | your child to different situations Provide love, |
| detachment and withdrawal can stimulate | | | | affection, and attention to your child Teach |
| frustration and even anger in parents. At the | | | | positive self talk Why is it you know exactly |
| same time, they need a strong relationship with a | | | | where your shy and withdrawn teen is? Go to : |
| trusting adult. By learning more about how shy | | | | There are ways to help manage the fear and all it |
| withdrawn behavior in teens occurs via | | | | takes is some effort to find those answers. |
| assessment, parents and practitioners can learn | | | | Advice for teachers on how to work with shy |
| how to treat its negative aspects. Assessment: | | | | children in the classroom. Experienced |
| One way to conceptualize shy/withdrawn | | | | professionals who specialize in anxiety disorders |
| behavior is to view a teen as "internalizing" his | | | | provide useful insights and tips for adults, children, |
| difficulties by becoming preoccupied or | | | | parents and teachers. |