| Shy or Withdrawn Behavior as Destructive or | | | | behavior is often contrasted with the sometimes |
| Maladaptive. Hundreds of thousands of teens are | | | | more obvious "externalizing" problems of an |
| bullied every day. Bullying has everyone worried, | | | | outgoing, direct teen who is busy stealing cars, |
| not just the kids on its receiving end. Yet because | | | | drinking and causing trouble for others. |
| parents, teachers, and other adults don't always | | | | Common Reasons for Shyness and Withdrawal: 1) |
| see it, they may not understand how extreme | | | | Self-consciousness (related to appearance, |
| bullying can get. | | | | behavior) 2) Under-developed social skills 3) |
| Social withdrawal is fear of, or withdrawal from, | | | | Substance abuse 4) Underlying feelings of |
| people or social situations. Shyness becomes a | | | | insecurity and/or inadequacy 5) Significant |
| problem when it interferes with relationships with | | | | introversion with ambivalent emotions 6) Identity |
| others, in social situations, or other aspect's of a | | | | confusion or uncertainty |
| child's life. Problems with shyness are usually | | | | In assessing your teen, look at whether or not |
| evident by the time a child is three years old. | | | | your child is compliant or defiant, reserved or |
| The shy/withdrawn adolescent may have major | | | | outgoing, routine or spontaneous. The shy |
| conflicts and issues but nobody knows. In fact, | | | | withdrawn teen will tend toward compliance, be |
| sometimes parents are not able to detect the | | | | reserved and prefer routine. He/she may move |
| internal storm or struggle in the shy or withdrawn, | | | | away or avoid others when difficulties arise. At |
| largely due to an external calm. | | | | times, withdrawn behavior can take on the role of |
| Shy and withdrawn teens are oftentimes highly | | | | indirect (sometimes passive-aggressive) anger. |
| sensitive to their immediate environment. Parents | | | | Below are suggestions for children who are |
| thus need to be available and consistent in their | | | | socially anxious, while parents should contact a |
| actions. Many adolescents lack an internal | | | | licensed professional for more specific anxiety |
| structure for control and find it difficult to focus | | | | problems. |
| on a consistent and constructive problem-solving | | | | Build your child's self esteem Develop your child's |
| plan."> Parents can help by providing meaningful | | | | social skills. Allow your child to warm up to a |
| structure.. | | | | situation and don't push them too hard. Expose |
| Unfortunately, teens may not have the | | | | your child to different situations Provide love, |
| self-awareness to recognize how their | | | | affection, and attention to your child Teach |
| detachment and withdrawal can stimulate | | | | positive self talk |
| frustration and even anger in parents. At the | | | | Why is it you know exactly where your shy and |
| same time, they need a strong relationship with a | | | | withdrawn teen is? Go to : |
| trusting adult. By learning more about how shy | | | | There are ways to help manage the fear and all it |
| withdrawn behavior in teens occurs via | | | | takes is some effort to find those answers. |
| assessment, parents and practitioners can learn | | | | Advice for teachers on how to work with shy |
| how to treat its negative aspects. | | | | children in the classroom. Experienced |
| Assessment: One way to conceptualize shy | | | | professionals who specialize in anxiety disorders |
| withdrawn behavior is to view a teen as | | | | provide useful insights and tips for adults, children, |
| "internalizing" his difficulties by becoming | | | | parents and teachers. |
| preoccupied or self-conscious. This type of | | | | |